Monday 14 April 2014

power.

Today I began reading "The Life of Pi".
Sadly, I've already seen the film, but I've always appreciated books over movies so during my time in Mexico I've tried to remedy this as much as possible (I've also read "The Help"- which I highly recommend).

Towards the beginning of the book the narrator, Pi, briefly speaks of something that I'd like to explore in more detail.
He talks about when he arrived to Canada from India and went, for the first time, out for Indian food. The waiter rudely remarks that he must be "fresh off the boat" because he is eating in the traditional style with his hands. Pi explains that this comment may have seemed small to the server, but to him the words "were like nails being driven into my flesh". The meal he had been enjoying seconds earlier lost flavour and his appetite vanished.

The server, like all of us at times, didn't recognize the power we hold over one another. Every one of us has this power. Every individual has the power to build up and knock down. I'd say this power is even more pervasive than ever before. Why? Because we can broadcast every experience on Instagram;  every thought on Twitter; every relationship on Facebook. All of these platforms allow for us to use our powers.

I don't want this post to be mistaken. While this is applicable to students in elementary, middle, and high school, I don't think our powers begin and end there. We easily dismiss the power of words to bullies of years gone by, but our influence doesn't end with puberty.

I fondly remember notes, messages, and comments that have picked me up when I'm feeling down. Last year, one of my cousins mailed me a surprise postcard from Southeast Asia, which I received after a long thankless day. I will always treasure the postcard, not for what it says, but for how much I needed that feeling after dragging my cold and tired body home.
Looking back, there are treasures from teachers encouraging me to be memorable; encouragement from bus drivers; whispered "I love you"s and "it's ok"s from parents; and "thank you" notes from students.
These are the words the built me up.
These words encourage me to build up too. I remember them when I'm at a bus stop and start a friendly conversation. I recollect them in how I react to the homeless or less fortunate.
Even when my day is bad, I find giving a kind word is even better than receiving one.
I've done some reading on happiness, it turns out the #1 thing you can do to affect your happiness is to bring happiness to others. I invite you to try.

As Uncle Ben in Spiderman warns, though, "with great power comes great responsibility". Use this power responsibly.
I warn you, because I know I've been careless with this power. I know I have said things when I'm irritated with myself, and hurt others because of it. I've said things when I'm rushed, or tired, or sad. I've snapped at someone because I felt they treated me unfairly. I've used every excuse possible to condone my behaviour - but that doesn't change how it feels to the receiver.
I've been in relationships where words were finely tuned weapons of destruction.
I know the noxious power we each hold because I've wielded it.

I also know it all too well for what the power has done to me.
In middle school I can think of countless times where words ripped me down. I can't express how thankful I am that I grew up without social media where I could open up every thought, experience, and friendship to the criticism of my peers.
More recently, the words that hurt the most are the ones directed to how my life is being lived. On good days these comments can be ignored. But on harder days they can sing in my head on repeat like an overplayed pop song. Words like this can become a bitter melody.
Sometimes they become our theme song.

Today I urge you to be mindful of the power you hold over others. Most often, I believe you won't know the power you hold. Don't let this stop you.
Our words are our superpower. Use them responsibly.

Carleigh

2 comments:

  1. Very insightful Carleigh. Well said!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks Uncle How! I have a feeling you're going to really like the next entry. It's being fine tuned, but it's laced with the controversy you love!

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Hey there! I love to hear from people like you! Actually, I'm not sure that I will like what you have to say, but I appreciate that you are going to say it! Keep in mind I won't be responding to rude or distasteful comments. Otherwise, lets be friends and continue the debate!